


In The Air

by hereonourstreet



Category: Hades (Video Game 2018)
Genre: Daddy Issues, Family, Gen, Implied Relationships, Implied Romance, M/M, Not Beta Read
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-17 16:35:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29228568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hereonourstreet/pseuds/hereonourstreet
Summary: Home is not where you live but who cares when you're gone.
Relationships: Thanatos & Zagreus (Hades Video Game), Thanatos/Zagreus (Hades Video Game)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 31





	In The Air

**Author's Note:**

> so the romance between Than and Zag is meant to be implied but it's pre-cutscene. It's like, before your tenth run. not the end but... like if you ship Than and Zag this would read as romantic, which it should, because it is, so I tagged it as both general and romance. whatever you get it (this is not beta read so sorry if there are small typos)

_Hate_ is too easy a word - maybe _despise_ is better, or even _loathe._ There has to be some bite to it and _hate_ is simply too lax in this context. It lacks a certain crushing finality; it’s too common. Too easy to disregard. One hears it and assumes hyperbole. _Of course he doesn’t_ hate _you. Of course not!_

Zagreus is certain that his father hates him. He can use whatever word he likes - it all comes down to the same outcome: Hades hates his kin and there’s nothing to be done about it. 

Of course, Zagreus could react worse to it, he thinks. He doesn’t hate him back, but he doesn’t roll over and take it. He will commit patricide over and over again for one glimpse of what he wants, which he would lead everyone to believe is his mother. He’s even convinced himself of it. And to be sure, he does. He yearns for his true mother in a way that’s indescribable, a way that he can’t even feel fully himself. It’s a desire so great that it’s beyond him. So far away that he can’t even see it. 

But there’s something else - an even greater need. One that Zagreus will not admit to. He can’t admit to it. He doesn’t allow himself to acknowledge it. He doesn’t permit any emotions that come close to it, there is Persephone and Persephone alone. He does not need to think about it. He does not perceive it. 

So it’s especially frustrating when there’s someone who does. 

“Zagreus.”

Than’s voice is so annoyed, as always, that Zagreus has chosen to disregard true conversation. It’s the lounge! It’s contraband! Should they not discuss more fascinating topics than Zagreus’s familial relations? But Thanatos _is_ a bit of a familial relationship, at least in that Zagreus cannot imagine his life without him. And usually when Thanatos wants something from him, Zagreus concedes.

“Come on, Than. Don’t you get tired of carrying souls day in and day out? Or… whatever time it may be. Relax a little.”

“I’m relaxed,” Thanatos assures him. Zagreus takes another drink. 

“Then why are you insisting we talk about my mother and father?”

“Because you left,” he says. “You left m - you left all of us without a word.”

“I had to do this, Than. And anyway, I come back every time, don’t I?”

“You didn’t know that would happen,” he says. “And if there comes a time where you don’t _have_ to come back, will you of your own free will?”

Zagreus has always been in love with Thanatos. The thing is, he doesn’t care if it’s romantically or familially. He knows he needs Thanatos with him and that’s all he cares about. 

...But if it is romantically, Zagreus wouldn’t mind. Thanatos doesn’t seem interested in that, though, or at least, Zagreus doesn’t think so. It’s kind of hard to tell with him. 

“Death for mortals often ends in blood,” Thanatos says suddenly. “And your rebirth begins in it. Emerging from a pool of blood over and over again. Isn’t _that_ tiring?”

Not when it’s for a cause like this, Zagreus thinks. Not when it could result in… Anyway, Zagreus isn’t sure that Thanatos knows his blood is red, like that of a mortal, and his father certainly made sure he knew to be ashamed of it, and as such, he isn’t sure he should mention it. So he doesn’t. Instead:

“There’s more to it than that, Than.”

“Of course there is. Do you really think I assume I know everything? You’ve kept secrets since day one, Zagreus.” He pauses as if something has just dawned on him and Zagreus’s blood runs cold, ironically enough. 

“Than-”

“This isn’t about your mother, is it?” he asks. “At least, not completely.”

He’s figured him out. He’s forced Zagreus to admit it to himself, even. This isn’t all about Persephone. And maybe it’s the ambrosia, but saying it out loud doesn’t feel as bad as he thought it would:

“I have to leave here.”

He has to go. If he’s able to steal away with his mother, perhaps coax sympathy from Nyx and live cloaked under her veil forevermore, he can leave this place. He’s the prince of the underworld, but this place doesn’t own him. 

Does it?

It’s not a title he asked for, nor is it one he wears proudly - or ably, truth be told. His father has always scolded him, but he must admit, he doesn’t exactly understand princely duties, though he’s well aware that to some like Dusa, he’s the spitting image of underworld royalty. He’s only able to speak to Hades the way he does because he’s his son - well, sometimes Hypnos doesn’t exactly watch his mouth, but he isn’t disrespectful. Just obtuse. 

Anyway, the underworld is not where he belongs. Right?

“Why?”

Than’s voice can’t hide the sadness. It’s so apparent - and foreign - that Zagreus actually looks up at him quickly, realizing the room is spinning now. This stuff is very potent. No wonder even Dionysus sticks to wine on a daily basis. 

“You know why,” Zagreus says. 

“Do I?”

Now Zagreus is miserable. He knows it’s showing on his face but Thanatos is still having a hard time hiding it from his own, too. 

“The fates don’t have to control us, Than,” Zagreus says, crying out for some kind of strength. Something to make his voice sound bold and confident. “We don’t have to do the expected. We can find our own way.”

“Oh, Zagreus.”

“It’s true,” he insists. “And you can, too. You can come with me.”

“Zagreus, this is our home.”

“It’s not. This is not where I’m meant to be.”

“That’s not what _home_ is, Zagreus.”

He’s a bit surprised. And confused. 

“Then what is it exactly?” he asks. “Tell me. Tell me what _home_ is, Than.”

He shakes his head with a sigh. At first Zagreus thinks he isn’t going to answer. But then:

“You can run all you like. But you can’t get away. You can’t escape fate. And I know that sounds awful. I know that kills you inside. I am… trying to see things from your point of view. And I understand. I do. But you don’t stop to see them from ours.”

“And what is yours, then?”

“That we would miss you.”

Zagreus scoffs. He has to. He’s not a self-deprecating man, but hearing that is hard. It’s difficult to imagine. He can see Thanatos being upset. 

“I doubt _he_ would c-”

“Of course he does, Zagreus!” Thanatos shouts. “Of course he cares! Do you really think the only reason he tries to stop you is because he doesn’t want you to speak to her?”

“You don’t know what y-”

“Your father would miss you, Zagreus. As would I. As would my mother and my brother. And Dusa and Meg, for that matter. _That_ is what home is. It’s not simply a dwelling. _Home_ is not being considered royalty in this lounge. _Home_ is the place full of those who notice your absence. And wish you would come back to fill it.”

He says it all so slowly but Zagreus isn’t in a place to stop him. He’s inebriated, but also wants to hear it all. He wants to know what Thanatos has to say, but it doesn’t sound like Than at all - or maybe it does. Than’s been imbibing too, after all. This is what he wishes he could say. This is how he really feels. 

Zagreus is grateful he’s shared. He has to do what Thanatos would want him to: change the subject. 

“Sounds like someone’s had too much,” he says with a small grin. Thanatos, predictably, scowls at him. 

“I have,” he agrees. “But it doesn’t change anything.”

“No?”

“It doesn’t change that you were happy to leave without me. Without even _telling_ me. So go ahead. Keep running. But even if you get away, even if you escape and never come back, _we_ are your family. And you can’t run from the blood.”

Zagreus’s breath is stuttered as he tries to fill his lungs, watching Thanatos stand and leave. He watches him go, not close to tears, but close to something. Close to a feeling he isn’t sure he’s ever felt before. 

He can foster new relationships. There are mortals who have never met those who sired them yet they still find a family. It’s not about who was born of whom. Zagreus’s red, mortal blood will follow him wherever he goes. It’s something he doesn’t share with his _family,_ but something that ties him inexorably here. His father is his family. This isn’t a mess he can simply run from because deep down, he doesn’t hate him. His blood is his home. And from that, there is no escape. 

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> i'm not saying i agree with any of this pontificating on familial obligations, but i think about it a lot and _In the Blood_ really gets to me, especially the line in the summary
> 
> um you can find me on my fandom [twitter](https://twitter.com/UgetsuMurataaaa) or even my [website](https://ambuckle.com)


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